What is the Toughest Thing Clients Have to Deal with When Grieving a Loss?

The toughest thing clients have to deal with when grieving a loss is CHANGE.

Let me prove my point by asking you to participate in a quick experiment...
Grab One of your coats or jackets. Put it on. There, that wasn't so hard, was it? Now, take the jacket off. Put the jacket on again...this time, while you are putting it on, notice whether you put your right arm in the jacket first, or your left arm in first, when putting it on.


Now, take the jacket off again. As you put the jacket on this time, put the other arm in first...if you usually put your right arm in first...instead..put your left arm in first, and then your right. If you usually put your left arm in first, instead put in your right arm first and then, your left arm. 

What did you notice? It was alot harder to do it in a different way than you were accustomed to, right? You have probably been putting jackets on all of your life...but when you had to change your routine, or alter the status quo, it became more difficult..maybe even frustrating?

What happened? You experienced 'change.' I asked you to do something differently...and it was harder than you thought it should have been...after all...it was just putting on a jacket.

Now let's look at 'change' from a grief perspective. Clients have a hard time grieving because in addition to the emotional upheaval, things have changed. Life is different. If the loss is a spouse, the client may have to live alone, or move, or do chores their spouse once did. They may no longer 'fit into' their couples Sunday School class, or be invited to couples social gatherings, and so on. You get the point. To experience a loss, results in 'change.'

As grief life coaches, one of the most important things we do, is acknowledge the change our clients are experiencing and talk about how hard change is when it happens. We provide comfort, when we let our clients know that while change is hard, over time, change may be better, and if not, at least we can become accustomed to the change, so that it becomes easier to deal with on a daily basis.

Could you benefit from training in templates which help your clients cope with 'change' which comes from various types of loss? Stay tuned. You won't want to miss it! In upcoming months we will be launching many of our trainings online. 

In the meantime, we pray that God continues to bless you in ministry, wherever you find yourself.