Pray for your client. Prayer is the number one key to a successful coaching session. You can attempt to push through this type of work on your own, and you may even be successful for a period of time...but NEVER underestimate the power of praying for your client. The Holy Spirit is a necessary part of every session. We have witnessed life changing, aha moments which we KNOW were due to the presence of the Holy Spirit. When should you pray? Before, especially during, and after every session.
Empathize and Bond with your client. Everyone experiences grief and loss in their life. Empathizing with your client should not be difficult to accomplish. Having made this point, we are not saying that you tell personal 'war stories,' or constantly comment, "I know exactly how you feel because I remember when this happened to me..." stories. Let your client see through your facial expressions and non-verbal cues that you 'get them' and are connected (bonded) to them through common life experiences of dealing with grief and loss in life.
Use a Coach's Template. While we know that there are alot of talented counselors, coaches, and Stephen Ministers out there, in our experience, using a template, which is your framework for your sessions, is beneficial. We are not saying to act like a robot and never deviate from the 'script' of a template, but we have found it to be a consistent method of effectively interacting with a coaching client.
Use examples from Scripture. We find that our clients take great solace in these tried and true examples from the lives of Bible characters. Use these stories to create rich and meaningful sessions. Let the Bible illustrations 'speak' to your client in ways you can not. Let the Scriptures bring hope and healing to your clients.
Remind yourself to be an Active Listener. Being an active listener is crucial. If you have not prayerfully entered a session and you are not willing to devote 100% of your attention and energy to your client, your session will be lackluster instead of God honoring and amazing.
Ask open ended questions. Some of the greatest quotes ever given by famous people were the result of a carefully crafted, open ended question, followed with a period of silence by the asker. Asking open ended questions is one valid reason for chosing to use a template where the questions have already been crafted for you to allow the client maximum benefits from the session.
Refrain from responses which could be interpreted as judgmental. In your basic training you were taught to listen 90% and talk 10% or less. The more you say, the more likely you are to 'open mouth and insert foot', which must be avoided. Also, your responses can interrupt the flow of the conversation in the manner the Holy Spirit was guiding and can result in a disconnect between you and your client.
Encourage, Support, and Challenge your client. A successful giref and loss coaching session is characterized by affirming your client. Re-assure them that you understand their emotions and unique situtations. Additionally, a successful session is one in which the coach challenges the client to answer the tough questions and to set goals and action steps to move forward when they are 'stuck' in their grief.
Our prayer for you is that you are regularly being blessed with coaching sessions which empower and encourage your clients. But perhaps as you are reading this, you realize that you have the head knowledge to agree with these keys to success, but you are not putting these keys into your real time coaching sessions. If this is your reality, then consider signing up for a refresher course or one of our other course offerings which will be available soon as an online course later this year.
No comments:
Post a Comment